It’s not You, it’s Me

Have you ever had a moment in which you think “What the F did I just read”?

Well I have had two of those moments this week enough for me to ditch many of the AP groups I was part of, one of these moments included dog food. Yes I said it dog food.

Earlier this week we had left overs of roast beef and mashed potatoes (  Homemade!!!!). The kids decided that they did not want to take part in dinner. Which was fine less work for me. No extra dishes to clean, no mashed potatoes to scrape of the walls, and no yelling at the dogs to stop begging.

What did they want to eat instead?

Dog food right from the dishes.

Fine go ahead. I will pick my battles and in 90 degree heat with a dew point of 78, I was not going to argue with why one should eat hot roast beef and mashed potatoes. In fact If I did not have taste buds and had not grown up learning dog food is not cool to eat. I may have been on the floor eating with them.

Well I decided this would be fun to share in one of the attachment parenting groups. I mean it WAS funny after all.

Well according to the APP ( Attachment Parenting Police). No. This was not funny and I the parent needed a talk in what was nutritional food for my children.

APP #1- “You really shouldn’t let your kids eat dog food. It isn’t good for them”

APP# 2- If you are looking for great snack ideas kale chips are great”

APP# 3- ” You could be potentially be poisoning your child. Many dog foods are being recalled from China. I second the kale chips my 11 month old loves them.”

W.T.F

I have had kale chips.. they taste like sh*T. Yes I said it! I hate kale chips, I would rather lick my child’s poopy diaper! My kids  hate kale, my dogs even hate kale, and they have eaten poopy diapers!

*calming down*

Let me ask

Whatever happened to just sharing a funny parenting moment? When did we become so caught up in out doing one another that we have to criticize funny moments?

Yet this isn’t the first time I have seen this in AP groups. The attachment parenting police are everywhere. I have also notice they also tend to be the crunchiness police. Not saying all AP parents are crunchy, but I have notice they go hand in hand.

I have seen posts about yeast infections go from what to do, to the original poster having shoved coconut oil up her gopher hole (vagina), and when that didn’t work she is advised to shove garlic up the vagina.

W.T.F

*calming down*

What I am trying to say is, I have had enough. I have come to realize I can stand by AP tendencies without subjecting myself to judgement and cray cray people. To my attachment parenting groups I am sorry but it’s not you it’s me ( OK well actually it is you, but I am trying to be nice).

Why be part of groups that the most active members are people trying to out do each other, on who is more attached to their child. Yet in all reality we are all attached to out kids no matter what your parenting style is.

So yes, I left many of the AP groups I was part of due to dog food. Though you probably notice I said I had two incidences this week.

The second incident was the following question:

“Is anyone familiar with nonviolent communication?”

I apparently to the original poster forgot to read her mind and what she really meant by this question. So the way I responded ” you mean not be violent when speaking” and “this was just mind-blowing” were unacceptable answers. Soo unacceptable that the woman called me the “see you next week” word. Which with her use of the word, I may have mentioned, I could see why she was seeking someone with the experience.

Anyways, I had to leave before I became the woman feeding her kids kale, and walking around with garlic shoved up my gopher hole ( vagina) all so that I could brag about it online. I had to leave for my sanity. I am not speaking for all AP groups or parents. Yet only from my experience.

Oh and by the way… My dog food is organic, dairy, gluten-free and not made in China. So HA!

2013-05-29_20-11-27_802

Breastival of Nurslings -Giveaway!

So awhile ago in another blog post I said ” Every mom should have a professional nursing photo done at some point”

Well guess what? I get to give a lucky mom that chance! Though that mom does have to live in the state of Minnesota and about to attend the event August 24th, 2013 from 3pm to 7 pm.

The event is called the Breastival of Nurslings though for some reason I want to say Breastival of Nations. This event is being held by the Normalizing Nursing in Public League.

More about the event from them…

“Tired of only having self-portrait nursing photos where everything is too dark, out of focus, and quite frankly you can barely tell what is going on? Well, the Breastival of Nurslings is here to fix that and have fun while doing it!

Attire Advice: Look around the internet for breastfeeding photos you like… what do they all have in common? Time to throw modesty out the window! No covers, no hiding under baggy shirts – time to “whip ’em out” as they say. Button down shirts or a shirt you can comfortably go up over the top is probably your best bet. Go braless or with a bra that has nothing left on top once you unclip the cup. Less busy the pattern on the clothing the better, plain bold colors or bold patterns work best (like polka dots or solid colors). Also, keep jewelry to a minimum because it distracts from the nursing moment”

You get to let it all hang out and not get weird looks and stares!

oh and one more thing

The awesome woman who did my breastfeeding photos will also be there along with other photographers! She does awesome work!

If you have purchased the tickets for this event, don’t worry! You will be refunded if you win! Plus there will be food!

Have you had nursing photos done before? Did you like them/ hang them up? Comment below!

Big Thank you to the Normalizing Nursing in Public League!

P.S. I will see you there while I help check everyone in!

Click below to enter giveaway!

a Rafflecopter giveaway
// <![CDATA[

// ]]>

Sometimes ish Happens

So I find that when I am buried in working on projects .. my family and friends tend to get a bit crazy. As if they are like ” hey Iola needs to focus on something else so let’s do weird and gross ish.” Last week I was planning a Big Latch on event… this happen to be the week of did that really just happen and was that really said. So here is just some of the crazy ish:

Not hearing the husband ( I wont say if I don’t listen intentionally).

Chad tens to ask many questions. and sometimes I really don’t hear them, or I misunderstand what he ask.

Chad: Did you feed the cat?

Me: Yes ( I heard kid)

Chad: what did you feed her?

Me: From my breast duh

very silent and awkward pause and the look on his face told me he wasn’t talking about the kids.

Chad: You breastfeed the cat?

At this point I said no and explained I thought he meant our youngest child. He still won’t let it go and mentions it from time to time.

Though I will say in my defense even if I did nurse the cat I wouldn’t be the first to feed an animal from my chest.

Like this >>>>woman-breastfeeds-pug-510x600

Though I will say women use to breastfeed animals back in the day to boost their supply… Just saying.

Now on to the dog… I have a love hate relationship with our dog. Meaning some days I love her and some days I could care less.

Warning if you don’t like hear about puke don’t read!!!!

So Akilah ( The dog) is back into the bed .. apparently a soft plushy pillow in a kennel isn’t good enough. Well one night the cat decided to beg me for food .. as in let me scratch your leg and whine until you feed me. So I caved in and fed her… how does she pay me back? She pukes under the bed. At this point I was in bed and not wanting to get up to clean cat puke. Well who comes to the rescue the dog!!! She ate the puke…. excuse me as I go dry heave on the sounds that came with it.

If that couldn’t be bad enough … she jumped back on the bed and licked me.

Now on to the friend crazies

So this part may be my fault but my brain was not working in my defense. My friend L and her daughter came over so we packed up the kids and went to the park. All was going until L daughter want to do the spinning monkey bars. Well I decided hey why not? So I grabbed the little one and she grabbed on to the bar. Well by this time my son C wanted to grab on. Well in my defense I told L’s daughter to hold on, yet apparently two year-olds don’t listen very well. As soon as I let her go to grab C …. well she just dropped. She dropped like a bag of bricks. So maybe the maternal instinct was turned off at the moment because I remember telling L ” I told her to hold on!” Though she is fine. A little shocked and I may have lost her trust but she is fine.

Oh and my son… well as soon as he watch his mom drop  …. watched his friend not listen, he was on the other side of the park.

Oh and at least I did not whack L’s daughter in the face with a fly swatter like my husband did. Just saying.

Yet she is fine… I promise.

Also though the picture below may look like innocent fun… But C ended up pushing her head first into the grass.

mail.google.com

She is fine though. I promise.

Oh and last thing… Shark week is about sharks on the discovery channel… not that 50 of my friends women and men have synced up and are all having their periods at the same time. Which may have been my first thought.

My Milk is Your Milk


World Breastfeeding Week 2013 Blog Carnival - NursingFreedom.org and The San Diego Breastfeeding Center

Welcome to the World Breastfeeding 2013 Blog Carnival cohosted by NursingFreedom.org and The San Diego Breastfeeding Center!

This post was written for inclusion in the WBW 2013 Blog Carnival. Our participants will be writing and sharing their stories about community support and normalizing breastfeeding all week long. Find more participating sites in the list at the bottom of this post or at the main carnival page.

***

I have been the recipient of donor milk and I have completed that circle by donating milk.

My oldest who is now two and some months… received donor milk when he was a year old. He started to puke after he had originally caught a stomach bug… but then he continued to puke. After blood test, and countless doctor visits we couldn’t figure out why he was puking. He would puke up his formula, and cows milk and yet we had no idea there was an alternative to either one. We just knew the options we had at the time were not working. I stumbled across donor milk after the hesitant OK from his doctor and the wild look from my husband, who did no protest seeing we had went some nights without sleep, I went out to find this liquid gold. Lucky for me I didn’t have to look far… we went out that day driving from the wonderful moms who had milk on hand. As my son continued to puke in the back seat.

After a week and a half of puking ….

The puking stopped by that evening after only having breast milk.

Now I don’t know to this day what caused the puking for sure. Yet I do know my husband is a believer in breast-milk sharing and I had to pay it forward.

I was about half way through my pregnancy with my second son …. so lets say I was more than excited to get this chance to donate milk.

My breast have so far fed eight babies including my own.

I have spent countless nights pumping.

I have had five clogged ducts for times I was so tired I thought I would just skip a night of pumping …. yeah that idea backfired. Apparently I didn’t learn from the first or second time.

I have marked the bags of breast milk hundreds of times of how many ounces there were, the day, the time of day pumped.

I have ran the motor out completely of one pump.

My two year old is very well versed now in how a pump is to be used.

I found my first family on my local Human milk for Human babies page. They were twins a boy and a girl they were adorable. I remember when their other came to first pick up milk she came with a cooler. I remember think she is nuts there was no way I had that much milk. Yet I did I filled that cooler up.

My Second family were also twins. Also one boy and one girl. Their mom lived less than 10 mins away from me. They were preemies. This relationship turned into more than just hey here is some milk. We have shared dinners and laughs. Our oldest boys have played and fought each other. I have held those babies and have breathed in their baby scent. When we moved away I have to say I was disappointed it was further from them. Yet was very proud when that mom told me she was now about to breastfeed her babies with little to non supplementing. You worked very hard for that mama… and if you are reading this we still need to get together for dinner.

My other families were all women from a local cloth diapering group… All of whom I still speak to and have become friends with.

Now I don’t pump as much at the moment but I do have a small stash in my fridge… my pump also sits just waiting to be pulled out again to help the next family.

As for my youngest son Lyam… he has shared the first thing that he really cares about at the moment. His first lesson in sharing has happened… though he won’t remember.

***

World Breastfeeding Week 2013 Blog Carnival - NursingFreedom.org and The San Diego Breastfeeding Center Visit NursingFreedom.org and The San Diego Breastfeeding Center for more breastfeeding resources and WBW Carnival details!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants. Below are a list of links for today’s participants; you can find a complete list of links (updated throughout the week) at our main carnival page:

(This list will be updated by afternoon August 5 with all the carnival links.)

  • An Unexpected Formula-Fed Attachment — Kyle (of JEDI Momster and) writing at Natural Parents Network, exclusively breastfed three healthy babies. So when she was pregnant with her fourth, she assumed she would have no breastfeeding troubles she could not overcome. Turns out, her fourth baby had his own ideas. Kyle shares her heartfelt thoughts on how she came to terms with the conclusion of her breastfeeding journey.
  • It Take a Village: Cross Nursing — Shannah at Breastfeeding Utah shares how cross-nursing helped her baby in their time of need, and how that experience inspired her to create a community of cross-nursing and milk-sharing women.
  • Random little influences and Large scale support communities lead to knowing better and doing better — amy at random mom shares how her ideas and successes involved with breastfeeding evolved with each of her children, how her first milk sharing experience completely floored her, and how small personal experiences combined with huge communities of online support were responsible for leading and educating her from point A to point D, and hopefully beyond.
  • Mikko’s weaning story — After five years of breastfeeding, Lauren at Hobo Mama shares how the nursing relationship with her firstborn came to a gentle end.
  • My Milk is Your Milk — Lola at What the Beep am I Doing? discusses her use of donor milk and hhow she paid the gift back to other families.
  • World Breastfeeding Week 2013 Blog Carnival – Celebrating Each Mother’s Journey — Jenny at I’m a full-time mummy lists her experiences and journey as a breastfeeding mother.
  • Working Mom Nursing Twins — Sadia at How Do You Do It? breastfed her twin daughters breastfed for 7 months. They made it through premature birth and NICU stays, her return to full-time work, her husband’s deployment to Iraq, and Baby J’s nursing strike.
  • So, You Wanna Milkshare? — Milk banks, informed community sharing and friends, oh my! So many ways to share the milky love; That Mama Gretchen is sharing her experience with each.
  • Milk Siblings: One Mama’s Milk Sharing Story (and Resources)Amber, guest posting at Code Name: Mama, shares how her views on milk sharing were influenced by her daughter receiving donor milk from a bank during a NICU stay, and how that inspired her to give her stash to a friend.
  • Humans Feeding Humans — Krystyna at Sweet Pea Births shares ideas on how we can celebrate all the different ways modern mommies feed their babies. While we are comfortable with the breastmilk-formula paradigm, she proposes that we expand our horizons and embrace all the different ways mamas feed their infants.
  • When Breastfeeding Doesn’t Go As Planned — MandyE of Twin Trials and Triumphs shares the challenges she faced in feeding her premature twins. She’s still learning to cope with things not having gone exactly as she’d always hoped.
  • Taking Back My Life By Giving Away My Milk — When Amanda Rose Adams‘s first child was born, he was tube fed, airlifted, ventilated, and nearly died twice. In the chaos of her son’s survival, pumping breast milk was physically and mentally soothing for Amanda. Before long her freezer was literally overflowing with milk – then she started giving it away.
  • The Tortoise and the Hare — Nona’s Nipples at The Touch of Life discusses why we care about breast milk and formula with everything inbetween.
  • Finding My Tribe of Women Through Milk Sharing — Mj, guest posting at San Diego Breastfeeding Center shares her journey breastfeeding with low milk supply and supplementing with donor milk using an at the breast supplemental nursing system. She shares the impact milk sharing has had on her life, her family, and how it saved her breastfeeding relationship.
  • Human Milk for Human Babies — Sam at Nelson’s Nest shares her perspective on milk-sharing after an unexpected premature delivery left her pumping in the hopes of breastfeeding her son one day. Sam’s milk was an amazing gift to the other preemie who received it, but the connection was a blessing in the donor mom’s life too!
  • Sister, I Honor You — A mother feeding her baby is a triumph and should be honored, not criticized. Before you judge or propagate your own cause, go find your sister. A post by Racher: Mama, CSW, at The Touch of Life.
  • Every Breastfeeding Journey Is Different, Every One Is Special — No two stories are alike, evidenced by That Mama Gretchen’s collaboration of a few dear mama’s reflections on their breastfeeding highs, lows and in betweens.
  • A Pumping Mom’s Journey — Shannah at Breastfeeding Utah shares about her journey pumping for her son, who was born at 29 weeks.