The Jameson House

SIDS is the leading cause of death for Infants 1 month to 12 months old. Each year SIDS claims the lives of almost 2,500 infants in the US  – that’s nearly 7 babies every day. The National Institute of Child Health and Human Development (NICHD) defines SIDS as the sudden death of an infant under one year of age which remains unexplained after a thorough case investigation. SIDS occurs in families of all races an social economic backgrounds and in spite of parents doing everything “right” to lower the risks, SIDS cannot be prevented.

October is SIDS, Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, a month I hold close to my heart. In honor of this month I have chosen to share the Jameson House story.I was introduced to this family some time ago when a friend was asking for prayers because they had lost their son Jameson to SIDS. That same friend introduced me to their now project of creating a house parents who have lost their children to SIDS can come grieve, talk and receive help and support.

 

The Jameson House does not exist, yet. This is our story and vision…and why The Jameson House needs to be built. January 2nd, 2013 was the most incredible day of our lives.

Jameson Reid Stidger
Jameson Reid Stidger

At 2:17 a.m. Jameson Reid Stidger was brought into this world. I will never forget the look on her face when Jameson was put on the baby warmer…seeing the look in Gabby’s eyes that she was a Mom, finally after, carrying him for nine months. From that day forward, her life had changed. Gabby was a “mom” to my other three children but this was her own flesh and blood. I could tell then and there that she was born to be a Mother and her purpose in life was to nurture this little boy. For Gabby’s entire pregnancy, she did everything by the book. She took her pre-natal vitamins religiously, ate healthy, didn’t drink or smoke. Gabby is a RN (registered nurse) and knew the importance of doing things right.

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  She was a perfect Mom…from the day he was born until that day he was taken from us. I home office and she worked nights. Our  schedules worked out perfectly. I would watch him at night and when she got home in the morning, she would take over. Their nap time was so consistent…I could walk over to the couch where they were both sleeping at exactly 10:15 and take a picture of them sleeping together. It was beautiful to see a bond between a Mother and child that I had never seen before. They were in love.

 

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July 2nd ,2013 was a perfect day…we went to the pool as a family and had a wonderful time. This was the first day that 6 month old Jameson felt comfortable in the water. Later on that day we went out for dinner, went back home so Gabby could get ready to do her overnight nursing job. It was a usual routine. I would watch baby Jameson while she either napped or got ready for work, or both. His soft skin and beautiful smile. The way he would get shy sometimes. His funny, yet cute little hair part. His wonderful giggle. That day was a perfect day, our lives were perfect, even though our schedules were quit hectic. Everyone fought for Jameson’s attention. All the kids would want to hold him or take him for a walk. He was the light of all of our lives

 

 

. July 3rd, 2013…out lives changed forever. I woke up at 7:17 a.m. to find little Jameson lying on his stomach. When I went to turn him over, I knew he was not breathing. As panicked as I was, I gave him mouth to mouth and CPR. I placed a call to 911 and was hysterical, not only to know that our healthy, happy Jameson had gained wings…but to know that Gabby was going to come home from work wanting to feed him and do their daily routine. It was horrific. Words cannot explain the feelings or emotions. The image of that morning will be burned into my memory forever. Gabby came home to a nightmare that unfolded in front of her. Police cars, fire trucks, ambulances and worst of all, the coroners vehicle. The only questions was “why”? Why did this have to happen to him…to us? He was perfect in every way. Why would God take our son from us? Why?!?

July 7th, 2013 We buried our little boy, personally setting him in the grave to rest. Knowing that was his body and his spirit was in Heaven. Gabby and I were not in our right minds, and will never be. Gabby wanted to be with her son, not having a plan to kill herself, just not be here. The next morning, a doctor’s appointment was set up for her for evaluation. July 8th, 2013. In the morning, Gabby was admitted into a mental health ward in a Minneapolis Hospital. It was not the place for her. Gabby, being a nurse, knew what kind of help she needed and this was not the place. She called me crying hysterically shortly after we had left, telling me this was not the place for her and to PLEASE come pick her up…even pulling the “if you love me” card. I explained that we couldn’t but I would do my best to get her out. After spending two hours with her crying on the phone to me, I went back the same day to get her out, to no avail. I got her out the next day. She told me how awful the nurses were and had nobody to talk to. We were promised that she was going to get help. If you call showing where she was going to be sleeping and a nurse calling her disheveled “getting help”, than it was a success. She cried up and down the hall hysterically for hours, and nobody cared. Gabby needed to be with her family.

The one thing that came out of her being in lock up was her idea of The Jameson House. While lying in that white room, with nothing on the walls, she imagined the perfect place. A place that hand comfortable beds, walking paths, a bench around a pond to watch wildlife…someplace serine. Most importantly, a place with therapists, RN’s and a doctor to do rounds once a day. We would also offer clergy for each patience’s preference of religion. The Jameson House would be a get away from all the people calling and knocking at the door, dropping of the next pan of lasagna. A place to grieve, heal and learn how to carry the pain and to get the necessary help. We later got a bill for $4100 from the hospital, for the worst possible care, ever. TJH would be free for the first two weeks. July 9th. We brought Gabby home, where she belonged, but stopped to see a therapist on our way. She made us feel at ease and it comforted us slightly, but did not take the pain away.

We just have to try to learn how to carry it. There have been many nights that Gabby has been crying on the garage floor and me lying next to her. So many times saying to ourselves that we both need to be at The Jameson House…that does not exist. The tears. The anger. The questions in our minds of why. Everyone we talk to think TJH is an incredible idea. The Jameson house does not exist, yet. We are taking all the steps to put it into motion. The plan is to build the first one in the Minneapolis area, in the suburbs on some acreage. We are having plans drawn up of what the house will look like. Taking into consideration that the walls have to be sound proof and all rooms handicap accessible. We would want meetings every week for grief groups and SIDS, so there would have to be a ample room. We would want a large kitchen area and dining area to accommodate 4-8 couples. It helps to be surrounded by people that are going through the same tragic experience. The floor plans of TJH would stay the same in every city that is built around America, we would just have to find the land to build them on. There are thousands if not tens of thousands of people in our same state of mind that could use a place like TJH to feel comfort, right now.

 

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For More on the Jameson House Project or how you give to this project please visit the links below:

The Jameson House Facebook Page

Jameson House Webpage

Connect on twitter

On October 15th at 7:00pm I ask you to join me and others across the world in lighting a candle in honor of Pregnancy and Infant loss Remembrance day.

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More than just baby stuff, Bees, and if babies ruled the world. (Giveaway!)

So this weekend I was in Spring Valley, WI helping my dear friend Ali with her store opening of Bizzing Bea! I was pretty excited: No toddler, Country living and cheese curds! I even wore my cowboy boots to fit in. Though I learned no one wears cowboy boots in small towns and my act of trying to fit in was received with laughs by the locals. Here are some pictures of Ali’s store:

Bizzing Bea is more than just cloth diapers and pacifiers, there are also treats for moms of the babies. Including: Lunette cups, Essential oils ( LuSa Organics), Watkins cleaning supplies ( which are safe to use around kids), and Noodle and boo. All awesome for adults and kiddos OK will except the Lunette cups. The store has a beautiful open layout. I highly suggest you visit this week if in Spring Valley (Store at the moment is a trial run and will close Thursday until things are sorted out).

Though eventually we were taken over by the babies of the store, here is their picture story:

Ella offed  her mommy and took over the store.
Ella offed her mommy and took over the store.

Then trouble came in from the west:

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Where he stopped at the local bar for shots of breastmilk before he started trouble in town:

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Then he stopped at Bizzing Bea and attempted to destroy the store with diaper pins :

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This landed him behind bars:

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Where he found a RE-PLAY spoon to attempt to make a shank out of. He failed.
Where he found a RE-PLAY spoon to attempt to make a shank out of. He failed.

Well after begging and pleading he and the store owner made up:

20130921_170039Then he left town to never ever return:

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Then some how the adults put Ella in baby jail and we took back the store though no pictures of that battle.

Now time for a story. I have learned even if I cross state lines crazy ish still happens to me. This time I discovered I was allergic to bees. Yes bees which Ironically is the mascot of Bizzing Bea.  I even had received a warning before all of this craziness happened. During a babywearing demo I was teaching at the store, a woman had warned the kids to not leave your pop outside, that the bees would go after it. I apparently decide to be idiot of the day. Because with in 2 hours I was sitting on our parade float, with a pop that had been opened for about an hour. Just before I drank from that pop Ali’s husband had just chased a bee away. Well I drank from my pop, a second later I felt a sharp pain and something fighting to get out. I spit and cried and there was the bee. Now most people would have some swelling after being stung in the mouth. Well I had some swelling and more.

Here is me before the sting:

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Here is me after:

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Isn’t that super sexy?

Oh and by the time I arrived to the E.R I had a natural duck face:

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My sweet husband laughed.

Though after a steroid shot and a ton of Benadryl later I looked a bit better and slept the rest of the day away.

Now on to the giveaway!!!

So in honor of Ali’s store opening we have a pretty sweet giveaway! A Bottombumpers custom Diaper!! With the Bizzing Bea Bee on the butt!!!

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This diaper is a Large and light blue. I wanted to steal it for myself. Baby is not included. (Retail value $25) Enter Below:

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Bottombumpers diapers are made right here in America!  More about them here: Bottombumpers

You can also find them in Bizzing Bea and online Bizzing Beas website.

Good luck on the giveaway! Also if in Spring Valley this week come visit the store! Also avoid drinking pop that has been sitting out in the open, there may be a bee in it.

Catbird baby Pikkolo- Everyone loves a giveaway!

I have to admit I may have adult ADD which has resulted in a Catbird Baby Pikkolo Carrier to sit on my bookshelf for a good two months. I thought the box has made a great decoration to our home. Yet my husband disagrees and has said it needs to go, like now.

Well I first bought my Pilkkolo online, at this point I had an ergo but wanted another carrier. Well it came i the mail and it instantly became my hiking and dog park carrier because of the back strap cross support in the back when I would carry Lyam on my front.

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Some specifics”

Recommended weight – 8 to 40 pounds

The Pikkolo is based on Mei Tai style Carriers.

Carrier includes a hood, chest strap and instructions.  There is an optional Support waist belt, I never used one with mine.

100% Cotton

You can do a Front carry ( Never tested it out here. Says that front carry is ergonomic, yet I have doubts about that), Hip Carry ( I loved the hip carry with this carrier better than with any other soft structure carrier), and Back Carry.

The fabric felt great! No having to breaking in!

My favorite feature No falling down pants. What do my pants have to do with a carrier? I am not the only one who has put a carrier on and once you start walking your pants start to fall down? Well the fact that there is no supportive belt and you have a fabric only like waistband your pants will never fall! Its like Magic. Though you can buy a supportive waist band, and it is suggested for children over 20 pounds. I never felt like I needed one.

Though this carrier did not go knee to knee fabric wise with my oldest who is two. It was surprisingly comfy and the fabric came pretty close to his knees. Though Fabric to knee is not required, it can make carrying bigger kids more comfortable.

Things I would like to change.

Storage. There is no storage compartments for anything on the Pikkolo. So this carrier would not be an all day around town carrier for me. So though I used it for hiking. I could not go hiking all day with it.

Thought the memory padded straps are great. They tend to be bulky for putting it in the diaper bag. Yet though I am pretty sure you can have one or the other and not everything.

If you are petite … this may not be the carrier for you. The straps are wide and may “overwhelm” you.

The webbing while strong, was too hard to pull through to tighten the carrier. At some points I would have to take the carrier off to tighten it. Yet mt Carrier is an older version. So this may have changed.

Due to the pikkolo not having a supportive belt automatically. My husband found it confusing. Yet all husbands are different.

Over all the Pikkolo is pretty great. I would give it 4 out of 5 stars

My toddler in the Pikkolo
My toddler in the Pikkolo

Now enough of my rambling on. Would you like a chance to win a Pikkolo? Thanks to Catbird Baby you can!! Just enter below!

a Rafflecopter giveaway
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Tide Pods and Heart Attacks.

If you are a parent you are fully aware that if you kids are quiet, you need to be worried. Usually in my house this means a floor or child has been colored on with a magic marker, or there is a clogged drain and the bathroom may become a swimming pool if I don’t stop it.

All of these quiet incidences have been innocent. Except last night.

Last night for some reason I decided to do laundry. I never do laundry, but at this point I couldn’t act as if the hill of clothes in the hallway wasn’t growing. Nor that there were some questionable smells coming from that hill. For all I know that hill may have turned into a monster that eats socks.

Well like any other day I grabbed our Tide Pods. I love these things and they work for our clothes and cloth diapers.

These things look like a treat to a small child
These things look like a treat to a small child

Now I have heard stories about things going wrong with pods and kids getting into them. So my husband and I decided to keep them on a shelf in our closet in between use. This is the shelf I put the pods back on when going to fold laundry.

Well as folding laundry, the boys went into their room to play and were really quiet. Quiet enough I mentioned it to a fb friends about how I should worry. So I set my laundry down and went to check on them.

As I walked into the hallway it smelled like laundry soap, I saw the boys in their doorway. Lyam was not only covered in soap but had three broken soap pods in front of him and one in his mouth…broken open.

As I discovered this my husband walked right in the door. Who at that moment had a “what the heck did I just walk to” look on his face. We immediately washed Lyam off and collected pods. This is when I asked friends in a chat I was already in  “do you bring them to the E.R.” In which their response was ” YES BRING HIM IN NOW!”

So we grabbed sippy cups and sped to Children’s hospital. When we arrived the nurse was already ready for our arrival ( we called a nurse line on the way). This was the point I realized that Lyam eating soap was way more serious than a ha-ha he got into soap.

After a work up and 2 hour observation Lyam was found to be OK to go home. He crawled away with just small little burns in his mouth ( irritation they called it), but is doing well.

Yet we learned a lot from last night.

If your child gets into the pods and has swallowed the soap get them to the ER right away. Usually once you clean the child up you notice the drooling and think oh they are fine. Yet within 10 to 20 mins from the incident the child can start to puke and then go unconscious due their tongue and throat swelling.

The tongue and throat can swell due to being chemically burned. This can land your child on a Ventilator to breath until these burns heal.

Also keep these pods far away from wondering babies and toddlers. Somewhere that even with a stool the child can’t get to them.

As for the Tide company, I will be writing a letter asking them to redesign the lid of the container. My toddler was not only able to open the container but he took the top off the container

As for the left over pods – they are in the trash, in a dumpster.

It’s not You, it’s Me

Have you ever had a moment in which you think “What the F did I just read”?

Well I have had two of those moments this week enough for me to ditch many of the AP groups I was part of, one of these moments included dog food. Yes I said it dog food.

Earlier this week we had left overs of roast beef and mashed potatoes (  Homemade!!!!). The kids decided that they did not want to take part in dinner. Which was fine less work for me. No extra dishes to clean, no mashed potatoes to scrape of the walls, and no yelling at the dogs to stop begging.

What did they want to eat instead?

Dog food right from the dishes.

Fine go ahead. I will pick my battles and in 90 degree heat with a dew point of 78, I was not going to argue with why one should eat hot roast beef and mashed potatoes. In fact If I did not have taste buds and had not grown up learning dog food is not cool to eat. I may have been on the floor eating with them.

Well I decided this would be fun to share in one of the attachment parenting groups. I mean it WAS funny after all.

Well according to the APP ( Attachment Parenting Police). No. This was not funny and I the parent needed a talk in what was nutritional food for my children.

APP #1- “You really shouldn’t let your kids eat dog food. It isn’t good for them”

APP# 2- If you are looking for great snack ideas kale chips are great”

APP# 3- ” You could be potentially be poisoning your child. Many dog foods are being recalled from China. I second the kale chips my 11 month old loves them.”

W.T.F

I have had kale chips.. they taste like sh*T. Yes I said it! I hate kale chips, I would rather lick my child’s poopy diaper! My kids  hate kale, my dogs even hate kale, and they have eaten poopy diapers!

*calming down*

Let me ask

Whatever happened to just sharing a funny parenting moment? When did we become so caught up in out doing one another that we have to criticize funny moments?

Yet this isn’t the first time I have seen this in AP groups. The attachment parenting police are everywhere. I have also notice they also tend to be the crunchiness police. Not saying all AP parents are crunchy, but I have notice they go hand in hand.

I have seen posts about yeast infections go from what to do, to the original poster having shoved coconut oil up her gopher hole (vagina), and when that didn’t work she is advised to shove garlic up the vagina.

W.T.F

*calming down*

What I am trying to say is, I have had enough. I have come to realize I can stand by AP tendencies without subjecting myself to judgement and cray cray people. To my attachment parenting groups I am sorry but it’s not you it’s me ( OK well actually it is you, but I am trying to be nice).

Why be part of groups that the most active members are people trying to out do each other, on who is more attached to their child. Yet in all reality we are all attached to out kids no matter what your parenting style is.

So yes, I left many of the AP groups I was part of due to dog food. Though you probably notice I said I had two incidences this week.

The second incident was the following question:

“Is anyone familiar with nonviolent communication?”

I apparently to the original poster forgot to read her mind and what she really meant by this question. So the way I responded ” you mean not be violent when speaking” and “this was just mind-blowing” were unacceptable answers. Soo unacceptable that the woman called me the “see you next week” word. Which with her use of the word, I may have mentioned, I could see why she was seeking someone with the experience.

Anyways, I had to leave before I became the woman feeding her kids kale, and walking around with garlic shoved up my gopher hole ( vagina) all so that I could brag about it online. I had to leave for my sanity. I am not speaking for all AP groups or parents. Yet only from my experience.

Oh and by the way… My dog food is organic, dairy, gluten-free and not made in China. So HA!

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Breastival of Nurslings -Giveaway!

So awhile ago in another blog post I said ” Every mom should have a professional nursing photo done at some point”

Well guess what? I get to give a lucky mom that chance! Though that mom does have to live in the state of Minnesota and about to attend the event August 24th, 2013 from 3pm to 7 pm.

The event is called the Breastival of Nurslings though for some reason I want to say Breastival of Nations. This event is being held by the Normalizing Nursing in Public League.

More about the event from them…

“Tired of only having self-portrait nursing photos where everything is too dark, out of focus, and quite frankly you can barely tell what is going on? Well, the Breastival of Nurslings is here to fix that and have fun while doing it!

Attire Advice: Look around the internet for breastfeeding photos you like… what do they all have in common? Time to throw modesty out the window! No covers, no hiding under baggy shirts – time to “whip ’em out” as they say. Button down shirts or a shirt you can comfortably go up over the top is probably your best bet. Go braless or with a bra that has nothing left on top once you unclip the cup. Less busy the pattern on the clothing the better, plain bold colors or bold patterns work best (like polka dots or solid colors). Also, keep jewelry to a minimum because it distracts from the nursing moment”

You get to let it all hang out and not get weird looks and stares!

oh and one more thing

The awesome woman who did my breastfeeding photos will also be there along with other photographers! She does awesome work!

If you have purchased the tickets for this event, don’t worry! You will be refunded if you win! Plus there will be food!

Have you had nursing photos done before? Did you like them/ hang them up? Comment below!

Big Thank you to the Normalizing Nursing in Public League!

P.S. I will see you there while I help check everyone in!

Click below to enter giveaway!

a Rafflecopter giveaway
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